Uncategorized Category

Cancer 42

Having a sort of end date to my life changes the way I think about things. When we don’t have such an end date we can put things off until later. We can say, ‘Yes, I would love to go there, but not yet, I have other important things to do’. I no longer have […]

Read More

Cancer 41

I have had my first oncology appointment. The consultant was very pleasant, appears knowledgeable, and answered such questions as I had. I need some further tests, particularly in relation to my dodgy heart, but I hope to start chemo treatment very soon. I had hoped they might say I can take a pilll every week […]

Read More

Cancer 40

It is the big day tomorrow. My first oncology appointment. It is hard to know what to think, and my feelings are contradictory. For all my attempts at rationalising the experience of dying of cancer I feel at times that my resilience is being battered and is in danger of breaking. While I have no […]

Read More

Cancer 39

We are away for a week, partly to see how I get on, partly because as soon as we get back I have my first oncology appointment which is inevitably going to be life changing, whatever they say, and partly because we really need to get away. I have mentioned before this phoney war stage, […]

Read More

Cancer 38

Well, there’s another achievement. Since I was sitting in the hospital ward I have wanted to get out and start running my life again. I am managing to write a bit and, as I said last time, work on my submitted manuscript, and we have been getting out for a drive and a bit of […]

Read More