Cancer 14

We all criticise social media for its triviality, its nonsense, its ridiculous videos, and so on, yet most of us get involved in one way or another, through Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, or all those others that I may or may not have heard of but don’t know what they do or how they work. I am rather a Luddite, though I use Facebook, and have accounts elsewhere.

I am never sure about Facebook. I enjoy flicking through the ‘pages’ (is that what they are called?) and looking at the news or what people are saying on the groups I am affiliated with such as Dull Men, Stiff Little Fingers, The Clash, Joy Division, old pictures of local places and something to do with Viz. It has nothing to do with work. I use LinkedIn occasionally for work purposes, or I pretend to. Twitter I don’t really understand. I am not sure why it exists. It is the same with Instagram. I set up an account but never use it. I am very glad that when I grew up the Internet did not exist, let alone social media. I was far happier digging holes, damming the local stream, making treehouses, forts and dens and replaying aspects of World War Two and other wars with either pretend guns (with friends) or real stones (with rival gangs).

Nevertheless I have found social media to be very helpful during this period of cancer, both mine and my sister’s. People have been universally supportive. I have had messages, both public and private, from all over the world. Yes, people used cliched phrases, but that is because those are the phrases that work, and there are only so many ways you can say things. Perhaps we shouldn’t call them cliched because of the negative connotations of that word. They are supportive statements. It is good to hear from people.

I have had stories of other people’s cancer, usually positive ones about how they are now clear of cancer and have lived for many years. Of course, no one is going to tell me that they know people who died of my kind of cancer. I appreciate honesty and openness, but not many people are willing to go that far!

Then there is this blog. I am currently writing my book about applied narrative psychology (I finished my penultimate draft today!), which is all about the ways we use stories in everyday life, not only to keep civilisation going but to deal with the problems we face. It is good timing. Writing this blog, this narrative, is cathartic. It helps me control my thoughts and emotions. Without it I would be a little bit worse than I am in terms of emotional distress and confusion. There is plenty of evidence that telling stories and writing stories helps people’s health. It is a way of focusing thoughts and feelings, it forces you to spend time on thinking through how you are feeling.

In the end, while social media is a terrible invention, it has its positive side.