Cancer 133

Perhaps going abroad with cancer is not all it is cracked up to be. I had rather an unpleasant morning today. Needing to avoid Amsterdam – one day is surely enough for anyone – we headed to a fishing village on the Ijsselmeer. It was a bit touristy but hey, we are tourists. We had booked a meal at an old smokery, six generations of men producing fine smoked fish. Unfortunately this morning I felt terribly bloated, along with my stoma bleeding and painful. Inevitably, I wondered whether this is how it feels when the cancer grows. We were walking past lots of food places and I just didn’t want to eat. Is this it? Crashing out in Northern Holland, unable to get home?

Or was It that I had been overeating, eating slightly strange foods, and basically overdoing it for the last couple of days?

It was the latter. By the time we had to go to the smokery I was ready to eat something. I was careful, a platter of smoked fish with bread and salad. I turned down the chips. And only two chocolates with a cup of tea.

Afterwards was a bit difficult. Walking round Edam my stoma filled quickly. I had to change it in the car. Pure liquid. It looked like a French curry. We set off home and only got a few miles before it filled again. The joys. I changed it by the side of the road.

I am cancelling my planned trip back to Amsterdam tomorrow. Too many potential negative consequences. Instead I will venture forth into the countryside again, leaving the wife to the evils of the big city.

I have lost much of what made my life worthwhile, but I still manage to retain many elements. One of these is food. Losing the ability to enjoy food would be very difficult. For a few hours today I thought that was it. Fortunately it was only temporary, but I do need to change my diet a little. More meat, salad and vegetables, fewer potatoes, less rice and bread.

We will see