Cancer 134

A happy trip to see the consultant yesterday. Had a bit of a cold so I worried that I would have to undergo a COVID test. I am ‘lucky’ because I have only had two tests, but I can hardly stand them. Having a sharp stick several metres up my nose is pretty unbearable, and I am speaking as someone who has undergone and is undergoing some pretty nasty procedures.

The only things I have found worse than a COVID test are having a camera up my backside and having the major operation to remove my cancer. I really don’t mind the endless needles that are stuck into me, dragging blood out or putting drugs in, even having a plastic tube sticking out of my chest is better than things being poked where they shouldn’t.

Perhaps it is a Freudian thing. As a man I want to poke rather than be poked.

Anyway, I managed not to sniffle or cough during my consultation. I obtained the results of my CT scan and there are no significant changes to the little lumpy bastards in my abdomen. The cancer has again failed to grow. The scan also showed that my hernia by my stoma is unchanged. I have been worrying about that as I get bloated and there is sometimes pain and what feels like stretching. I suppose it is just eating too much as usual. My bloods were fairly normal, so I have functioning organs. All well.

The best bit was the one bit of advice I was given. Eat more protein. I have been telling the wife that vegetarian days are not healthy for men. Now she will have to listen. It is formal medical advice being given to a seriously ill individual. I love vegetables, but they need to be accompanied by meat. And don’t tell me there are vegetables containing protein, we all know it is not proper protein.

Happiness is medical advice to eat more meat.