Cancer 85

I am undergoing my chemo treatment today. This is my 11th cycle of 12, and I am very much looking forward to a break. After the 12th cycle I will have my PICC line removed and will be free of treatment for 6 weeks, during which we will be heading to France for Xmas and the New Year.

I had a week’s delay on treatment this time due to having a bad cold. The problem with colds and chemo is that having a compromised immune system means that it is very difficult to shake off the cold, and there is a serious danger that it could turn into something more serious – and often more serious with chemo can mean death. Given that I have a weak chest anyway this can be a little risky for me. On the other hand, as I have only a limited time to live I have to die somehow and why not pneumonia rather than anything else?

I was looking again at the survival rates for people with my condition. While I have been told 50% chance of survival until early 2024 there are so many numbers floating around such as 50% chance of surviving for 9 months. I think I have already got that one sorted. The other interesting figure is 14% chance of surviving five years. Somebody has to be that one in seven. Why not me? My apologies for repeating things I have mentioned in other blogs but these things are important to me for some reason.

I also realise that I have been a little negative at times over the last month or so. This is presumably related to how I have been feeling, ie pretty shitty. I have decided that, given we know survival is related to positivity I need to be a little more positive about the situation.

Last week we got away twice. The first occasion was a day trip to Whitby, so I could get fish and chips and buy some of Fortune’s kippers, which are without doubt the best in the country. I had to drive 7.5 hours as the traffic was so bad. Given my condition, I did pretty well. We spent the weekend in the Lake District, trying a new place for afternoon tea, the Inn on the Lake (Ullswater), and another meal at Yan, Grasmere. All good. Unfortunately, we had to leave early as I had to start my chemo.

Given my recent media experience relating to the Welsh language, I have stopped putting my petty rages on Facebook. This is a little frustrating, as I have so many of them. I wondered about putting them here instead but that might get a little fraught, so we could talk about Israel/Palestine – or then again, perhaps not.

It is turning out to be a long day. My first drug was delayed for a couple of hours. Now I am waiting for the rest of the drugs, that haven’t turned up yet. This is turning out to be the day of the longest delays. No idea when I will get out of here.

OK, this is a bit boring – but it reflects how I feel so put up with it.